I miss my career.
I got my first job at age 12 and have always been a worker. I left my last position begrudgingly because it was—and still is—the best thing for our family. As my husband’s career took off, requiring more and more of his attention, it fell to me to take responsibility for everything else. I am chef, driver, shopper, scheduler, comforter, homework monitor, social secretary and a zillion other things that somehow feel like not much at all.
I don’t want to complain. I know I am beyond lucky. My family is amazing. I have two wonderful, smart children and a husband I love. We have a beautiful home, and even a summer home. I know I should just be grateful for all that I have.
Still, something is missing.
I take care of myself through exercise and yoga, but feel a sense of purposelessness. I miss that old sense of accomplishment I derived from my career. I miss making my own money. I miss colleagues and intellectual stimulation. At this point, I know I can’t go back and work 40-plus hours in an office, but I would like a better balance. Is there some way to find a happy medium? I have volunteered for years, but am bored with that. Do you have any other suggestions?
I have been where you are.
I, too, spent the first few years of motherhood feeling ambivalent at home after “begrudgingly” leaving my legal career to raise my children. I, too, regularly told myself—despite the misgivings and occasional frustration I felt—that this was “the best thing for my family.”
You don’t want to complain. Neither did I. Neither do legions of other smart, educated, formerly ambitious women who—for myriad and complex reasons, both personal and political—have traded in their briefcases for diaper bags.